On February 6th, 2012, one week after my initial foray in the direction of Helheim, I wanted to journey once more, and pass through the gates of that realm if I could. I felt pretty good about my chances since I had a key, given to me in trance by one of Hela’s handmaids and stored safely in spirit at the House in the Hill. So, before donning my veil and settling into trance, I did some divination, as follows.
I first drew three cards from my set of Dreampower Tarot trumps, to see what omens there were for my journey. The cards I drew were: Adam Kadmon (A man disappearing into/emerging out of a starry sky), Death (On the deck of a ship, a robed maiden in the role of Reaper holds a huge axe above a capering dwarf all in motley), and The Stair (A stone stair leads upward from an underground chamber, on the wall of which is etched a labyrinth).
I then drew three runes to see what advice they would give for my travels, and they were: Othalaz, Jera, Laguz.
The overall meaning of both of these readings seemed to suggest that my journey was worthwhile, and that I would likely gain some sort of insight or transformative experience with regards to my perception of Self. Not on this day, though, since I ended up going nowhere.
I made my offerings to Hella, to Odin Wanderer and to Freyja the Seidhkona, to my spirit allies, and to the spirits of my ancestors, and warded the room in the cardinal directions, above, and below with the witch’s foot sign.
When at last I prepared to settle into trance, I felt suddenly tired. I thought that this would simply cause me to reach a trance state more easily, but I kept thinking that I should lay down. After a few minutes I did lay down on my back, on the floor, still veiled and holding my staff, but my mind wandered, I couldn’t hold any images steady in my thoughts, and I was on the verge of falling asleep.
(In retrospect, I remember that among my offerings I had given some dreaming oil (mugwort and lavender together) and a drop of Sarah Lawless’s Oleum of Ygdrassil, another mild entheogen. I believe I got some of both on my fingers, and for some reason rubbed this mixture on my forehead above the Third Eye. This could have something to do with it…)
So, I went and took a nap on the couch, and took down my wards when I woke up.
I’m not sure why my attempt failed. Maybe I was just more in need of physical rest than I realized, and the effort of trying to journey brought this to the fore. I’ve journeyed when physically tired before, though, so I’ll just chalk this one up to a loss.
Even though my attempt at trance-journeying was unsuccessful, I’ll try again soon. With these kinds of things, often one is feeling one’s way in the dark, one foot in front of the other, slowly. Learning is by trial and error, by doing, by finding out what works and what doesn’t. In any quest for knowledge, both are equally important to take note of.